27 June 2010

The Pause

The message from you was cold.
Your image finally registered amongst the crowd inside the busy mall of Suria KLCC.
You were not interested for a meal, neither a tea.

You were looking for a gift in Kinokuniya, for someone I have no slightest clue about.
We were sitting facing each other in the cafe.
I was facing the glass panes that displayed the grandeur beauty of the urban garden ahead.

You passed me a paper.
I wrote that to you during the conference.
It’s composed of all Chinese characters.
You demanded me to explain
Word by word
Every meaning deciphered.

Your friend in Japan died tragically
You still love me deeply
I rejected your love
I wanted your friendship
You reluctantly nodded

You left me at the table
Looking into the greying KL skyline

You left me a choice
Or did you?

Wrong move, Honey.

You are more opportunistic than ever since I’ve moved into your place to join the team for preparing the conference, you have been regularly touching me. All over.

At most times, you are so desperate. You even dared yourself to grope my groins and slip in your tongue into mine in the morning where we were both lying right beside our multitude of sleeping friends.

Your hands even went all way inside despite my futile retaliation. For a second, I thought I was Iz. So this was how Iz felt? Nah... Iz does that because that’s his way of stimulating his partner, and that is not the case now.

I never felt so disgusted when I saw your face so close to mine the moment I opened my eyes. With your pimple riddled complexion, your attempt of making it better by applying cream doesn’t make it better – at all.

And you’ve decided not to talk to me after the conference, perhaps due to my rejection coupled with your ego.

Probably it’s a good thing after all. A chocolate cake in the past definitely did not buy you permission to get inside my pants.

20 June 2010


因为, 我更我自








12 June 2010


Since my arrival upon Khai’s house for the conference, I’ve noticed your display of attitude towards me. It doesn’t take a psychologist to realise that you’re deliberately avoiding me in all senses – even including working as a team for the conference.

It doesn’t matter because I understand you.

That status drama on Facebook was a bad misunderstanding between us, though I have to apologise for causing it; and I believe you have taken an additional stab because something horrendous must have happened to you if not a bad news you’ve heard.

You haven’t told me who was it.

Perhaps after the trip to the national museum, you’ve re-evaluated our relationship and decided to again, keep everything by yourself just like how you treat all other AIESECers.

Hours ago, something odd happened.

Your silhouette casted a shadow I cannot ignore. You were right beside me standing while I was working with my Microsoft Word. You quickly asked me if I still have my drinks around me. For a second I wasn’t exactly sure what you meant until I saw your eyes. Red. Tears.

You want my bottle of rum. I lied.

Then I followed you to a place where you were hiding, sitting on the stairs where you know no one can find you.

As I approach..

Your face turned into a slab of granite.

“Yes Savoir, do you have anything to ask?”
“No, then I could use my time to be alone”

You were crying.

This is the second time I’ve heard the legend cry. Probably will be my last.

When the day comes to a conclusion, we snapped into an awkward situation both of us, alone for a good 30 minutes. Only two questions from me and one unanswered.

“Did I betray you somehow?”


“Are we still in this term after the conference?”